08FEB09 Deceased's personal and funeral effects ©
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WELCOME, glad you could visit us, OUR TOPIC: "DECEASED's PERSONAL AND FUNERAL EFFECTS" THIS CHAT WILL PROBABLY BE COPIED TO www.funeralserviceprofessional.com FOR ANYONE TO ENJOY LATER. Just a few rules for everyone: 1. USE ONLY PLAIN BLACK TEXT 2 DO NOT USE COMPANY NAMES 3 DISCRIMINATION IS NOT ALLOWED. If you would like chat reminders please send to: LOWELLMA@AOL.COM
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Host_John: Hello Everyone
david1990: hellooo
Host_John: how you doing
hrbeckham has joined.
Host_John: here we are just dandy
daveb: hehehe
Host_John: a lot of melted snow
david1990: woot!
david1990: melted snow is good!
hrbeckham: Good evning
daveb: thank god
david1990: now if all the salt was off the roads
Host_John: Persnal Effects
Host_John: how do you handle them
Host_John: the medical examiner makes a list and has you sign for them
Host_John: most hospitals just leave all in a bag with no inventory list
hrbeckham: we get them back to the family as fast as we can
daveb: dirty soiled clothes??
hrbeckham: no just valuables
Host_John: what do you do with them Dave?
daveb: dont get valubles musch just poopy underwaer
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Host_John: good point not many valuables these days mostly soiled clothing
hrbeckham: if family ask for a specific item or items we will return them if there is no body fluid soil
Host_John: most of it get's discarded
daveb: most hopitals make family sign for them -- not us
david1990: No idea what we do with them.
daveb: i got a comb from Me office that we had to sign for------- Stupid
david1990: as far as i know jewlery and things get buried with them
hrbeckham: haz mat bag for most dirty items
Host_John: it would not be a bad idea to incorporate a question about personal effects at the arrangements?
hrbeckham: we usually wash and return jewelry to family
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Host_John: Jeeze Howard I thought red bag for blood stuff only
daveb: thats what the inspector is on his want list -- effects and embaling sheet
hrbeckham: I usually have things like rings, ear rings, watches etc in a velvet bag to return to family in the arrangament
hrbeckham: cloths soiled with body fluids goes in the haz mat bag
Host_John: we usually do arrangements before removal however with a house death we remove jewlrey prior to removal if we can
hrbeckham: I have been in some funeral homes that have a dedicated washer & dryer for soiled laundry
Host_John: intersting Howard
hrbeckham: we do not have that where I am at now
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Host_John: so they would wash the clothes and return them?
david1990: I believe thats what we do
hrbeckham: yes, sheets and bedding too
david1990: we have a washer and dryer off the prep room but it could just be for sheets
Host_John: a brief question at arrangements could settle the issue easilly I think
hrbeckham: sometimes the clothing has to be cut off...we do not return that
hrbeckham: yes sir
Host_John: we will consider this at the next staff meeting
CCowan has joined.
CCowan: Hi Everybody
david1990: Hey there
CCowan: Wuz up, David
hrbeckham: families like having clean sheets reurned to them in a nice bag
david1990: Not much, stayin warm and cozy
CCowan: where is everyone
Host_John: perhaps change the questionair for first call to read "is there any valuables or personal effects we should be on the lookout for when we go to the hospital/nursing home?
Host_John: Cc thay are at the Grammys
CCowan: Oh
CCowan: forgot about those
CCowan: what network
Host_John: on live as as we speek
hrbeckham: if you have the space a washer & dryer at the fh can boost your level of service delivered to your families
Host_John: CBS
hrbeckham: I have Fox News on in the background here
hrbeckham: Huckabee
Host_John: they are siniging up a storm at the Grammys
CCowan: thanks, John
Host_John: who do you give personal effects to?
Host_John: Contractees are not always the next of kin
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Host_John: we ask contractees
Host_John: for advice on what is to be done with Personal Effects
hrbeckham: I am tired out. worked all day Friday, up most of the night, worked all day Sat. got a few hours of sleep and back Sunday morning. got home a little over an hour ago. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
daveb has joined.
daveb: sorry had to step out
Host_John: Howard you need a long couch in the place for a dandy napp
Host_John: Understood Dave welcome back
hrbeckham: very busy week coming up Business is good
Host_John: plenty of people going to Heaven here too
Host_John: I felt once inaguration was over business would get going
daveb: jumpers?
Host_John: explain please Dave
david1990: we havnt seen that big of an increase over the past few weeks
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daveb: economy--- jump out window?
hrbeckham: Not jumping here....but I would sure like to give a few a little push toward the edge
harper has joined.
Host_John: the economy has folks spending less
hrbeckham: working hard toward to paying off all debt
daveb: a conga line to the crematory
MTMartin has joined.
hrbeckham: many people going low end with funerals and a lot of directs
Host_John: cremations have been predicted to rise and they are
CCowan: people don't have the money for the extras
Host_John: most still go with the wishes of the deceased
hrbeckham: trying to evaluate the market and a strategy to keep on the black side on the balance sheet
Host_John: offering services that folks can afford has always been our challenge
hrbeckham: preneeds way down
david1990: Do you charge for flower delivery to the family's house?
david1990: i know we throw that in free of charge
Host_John: have any of you had personal effects problems in the past couple of years?
hrbeckham: not usually
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MTMartin: What kind of problems with personal effects?
Host_John: we have had no problems but with the new century families we could have difficulties
MTMartin: I suppose the key word here would be careful inventory at transfer and followup throughout.
Host_John: not any problems at this time MTM, just suggesting we devote more time to a potential issue
MTMartin: Our people always ask when family is present
CCowan: well you know how 'sue' happy people are these days
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Host_John: ask the family at the time of first call or at arrangements is there anything we should make sure to get at the nursing home or hospital when we go there to get his or her remains?
hrbeckham: got to love those family disputes.....especially when they try to put the funeral director in the middle
MTMartin: Potential is a kind way of putting it when people are waiting to cash in on the dime store ring that turned to diamond and platinum when we leave the house.
Host_John: OPEN FORUM FUNERAL CHATTER UNTIL THE TOP OF THE HOURHost_John: Rental casket is pretty popular for cremation families
hrbeckham: on hose call we ask the family to remove all valuables before we leave with a family witness
MTMartin: Good way of getting the funeral receipt show paid in ful with a lost piece of jewelry that no one at the funeral home saw.
Host_John: I am wondering about rental flowers, anyone here ever try them?
hrbeckham: we have some
MTMartin: Number of years ago but not recently
CCowan: smart thing to do, hr. make 'em witness
hrbeckham: mixed results
hrbeckham: cremation families mostly
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Host_John: engage the family on the issue communication is a good path
CCowan: are these artificial flowers? be pretty hard to rent live flowers
hrbeckham: silk
hrbeckham: very nice high quality
CCowan: some silks you can't even tell unless you're up close or touch them
MTMartin: How do you show inventory of what stays and what is to be saved for the lfd closing the casket?
Host_John: we use a questionair to ask what should be saved prior to closing the casket
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hrbeckham: we put a postit note on the open top. When it is closed there is the list of what to remove & who to give it to
hrbeckham: only the minister sees it
Host_John: all staff see what the Saves are
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CCowan: that works, hr, as long as nobody goes behind the casket
CCowan: do you use the sticky note at the church visitation before the service?
CCowan: that's what I mean about people walking behind the casket
MTMartin: Why not?
MTMartin: When or if they ask - - tell them what it is for, same as the handles onn the casket, everything has a purpose.
CCowan: yeah, good point. my oversight. that's just common sense
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hrbeckham: usually not a [roblem with the post it note, just to be sure we post info on the bulliten board plus review info in the morning briefing
Host_John: we put it all on the hand out sheet for staff of that funeral
hrbeckham: by the way, got my Cfsp last week
Host_John: this way with a house removal and missing staff the saves get done
CCowan: Congrats, hr
CCowan: that's great:-)
hrbeckham: thanks
Host_John: how is your weather
Host_John: up in Lovely Lowell MA we had 53 degrees
Host_John: snow melting bigtime
CCowan: hr, how do fds get that? is it through ce?
CCowan: in the mid to upper 30's here in Mi
CCowan: yeah there's puddles here and there
Host_John: it has been a brutal winter
CCowan: you got that one right John
CCowan: Brb have to get laundry out of the dryer
Host_John: we will be here
hrbeckham: i wonder were all the regulars are lately
david1990: probably watching the grammys
Host_John: I have been busy on Sunday Nights for the past month
Host_John: back on track now
david1990: nice to have a night off aye?
Host_John: I have no idea where everyone is
Host_John: I love this chat but family comes first
david1990: yea
hrbeckham: oh yes
RonHast has joined.
hrbeckham: maybe it is time to try to get some mention in the trade press again
hrbeckham: well speak of the trade press
hrbeckham: welcome Ron
RonHast: What's on your mind?
RonHast: Thanks
hrbeckham: maybe a article to remind folks about the chat room is due
Host_John: Back on TOPIC NOW
CCowan: just sliced a nice juicy pear, too
Host_John: how do you find out what is to be saved before the casket is closed?
RonHast: I'm frustrated about this subject. 10 to 15 of the same people chiming in is either impressive or depressive.
Host_John: we have to go with the participatants Ron
hrbeckham: lets hope it is impressive
RonHast: John: Always place a note at the lid latch (hidden) or a small cloth bag if jewelry is to be removed. An important reminder .
hrbeckham: I usally see the same group at stae meetings as well
hrbeckham: state
RonHast: But for a potential audience of hundreds or thousands, by now it would inspire and draw.
RonHast: And I think there is a maximum of about 30 or so -- is that correct John?
Host_John: Input from the family is more effective if you bring it up at arrangemetns
hrbeckham: I see the same names in your colleague wisdom section in Mm
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RonHast: But to forget at time of closing the casket is an easy overlook. Believe me -- caskets have been disinterred because of forgotten jewelry.
hrbeckham: no doubt about it
Host_John: then there is the issue as to who gets the saved items
RonHast: Yes hrb, and that is purposeful. These people have committed to responding. So many others offer to do it, then never pick up. This is a spot check from all over the Usa.
RonHast: And with businesses doing from 50 calls to 3,000 or more calls. That brings a good cross section of ideas.
CCowan: someone mentioned disinterring on here a while back to get retreive Dad's watch
hrbeckham: good team communication, notes, and reminders are all ways to help us to remember to remove jewelry
RonHast: Hang a string with a little tag over the latch. It is hidden, but you can't miss it when the casket is closed. It works very well -- at least for dozens and dozens of years with our firms.
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RonHast: Have to disagree hrb. Just the knowledge is easily overlooked.
RonHast: I think a consistent method of reminding is helpful.
hrbeckham: that is why we also use the post it note on the lid as a reminder
RonHast: And when you close the casket, it is crucial. (sp?)
RonHast: Good idea hrb if it is a conistent policy.
Host_John: bringing saved items to family after closure in a clear zip lock bag has been very useful
hrbeckham: a consistent method usually works best for all
fluidpusher: I'm kind of late to the game, but from what I am reading I think I know what you are talking about
RonHast: Yes. Agreed. As long as it is consistent, it seems to work well. Hit and miss is dangerous.
fluidpusher: many of our families help up close the casket and participate in the removal of items, another way to verify right then and there what comes off and what stays on
fluidpusher: we also use the note on the lid, too
RonHast: Many funeral directors provide a cloth pouch for jewelry as a courtesy. Place the pouch as a reminder in the casket -- but not prominent. It is a nice little gesture and we never charge for it.
Host_John: we review with family the items that have been saved before the casket leaves the facility
CCowan: i remember yrs ago. they would shoo people out of the room when closing the casket
RonHast: Cost for a faux velvet pouch is about 1$.
Host_John: you cannot see in the pouch is what had us change to clear zip log
Host_John: lock
CCowan: i like the idea of allowing the family to participate if they want to
hrbeckham: we usually do one last check before we lock the casket
RonHast: Zip locks come in all sizes. I can see the possible benefit of seeing the jewelry or whatever inside. However, it seems to me a pouch with draw strings is more elegant, and can easily be opened of there are any questions. Again, there is no perfect science here.
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RonHast: But forgetting or misplacing is a big no-no.
Host_John: what ever works for you, the key is it is working
RonHast: Amen John.
hrbeckham: and not just jewlery remember to check bodies prior to cremation
RonHast: One bad experience with misplaced or lost or overlooked jewelry or personal items can turn a fine relationship with a family into a nightmare.
Host_John: remains are checked at the beginning of each day and at the end of the day
fluidpusher: We use the velvet pouch
RonHast: It becomes a keepsake. Nice.
hrbeckham: has any one ever stolen a piece of jewlery off a body during a visitation?
RonHast: Time out.....
Host_John: nothing stolen here
hrbeckham: what a problem that would be
Host_John: we have had coats taken
Host_John: change of season once a year someone will take the wrong coat home
Host_John: hope there are no car keys in there
CCowan: they caught a person some yrs back in my area for going to visitations and taking items of bodies. police intervened and the guy was prosecuted
Host_John: back to the saved items
Host_John: we do bring them to family for their approval and delivery right away
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Host_John: once in awhile a change is made in the save list at time of delivery
RonHast: Wife of the owner was in state with a 3 carat diamond -- other visitations going on --- and the ring disappeared. Sad experience.
Host_John: Yikes
CCowan: that is really sad, Ron
Host_John: what precautions would have prevented that?
Host_John: Video
CCowan: that would be a good one, John
RonHast: Some funeral directors sew a high profile piece of jewelry to the clothing or some close material.
CCowan: camera hidden nobody would know except for staff
CCowan: but rings, Ron, how could that be take care of
RonHast: There is probably no perfect answer. But I've observed the "sewing" technique many times with different firms.
Host_John: secure ring under hand with plastic or metal string
CCowan: yeah that could be done
CCowan: but
RonHast: Ccow -- a strong cloth string looped through the ring (hidden) then connected elsewhere. It works.
Host_John: what is Sewing technique Ron?
RonHast: Director must have a small scissors to disconnect at time of remova.
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CCowan: Ah i see
Host_John: how do you get tight ring off?
Host_John: cold cream works great
RonHast: The cotton string often used in the prep room works well. A thief would never anticipate it -- and quit.
Host_John: an excellent idea Ron
RonHast: Has worked for us for many years.
RonHast: We also had a policy of always removing glasses at time of casket closure. For a woman, they were placed in her hands. For a man, the glasses were placed in his suit pocket.
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Host_John: same here Ron
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RonHast: Simple, thoughtful touches.
Host_John: my father always told us the next person to open this casket may be an angry family, make the person look comfortable
RonHast: Well said John.
RonHast: And true with the details of folding in the outlay, and overlay -- with detail. So many just push them in. Detail in finish is part of excellent care and service.
Host_John: there is no need to rush the closing, give yourself time to do it proplerly
RonHast: I've seen so many take the overlay and just push it in unfolded and arbitrarily. It says a lot about the firm.
Host_John: OPEN FORUM FUNERAL CHATTER UNTIL NEXT TIME
Host_John: end recording